If you're happy and you know it

Zachary's got the old adage reversed; after previously being startled or scared by applause, he now appears to love it when groups of people clap their hands. This was well-demonstrated at Meh's Balkan women's choir's performance (yikes, that was quite the string of possessive nouns) at Folklife this afternoon.

Today was actually a pretty packed day for the little man -- in the morning, we met up with friends L & R (at their cozy new house), headed off to brunch in the city, then onward to the Seattle Center for Folklife (where a bunch of friends came out to support Meh's group, hooray!), before wrapping things up with dinner with visiting LA friends C & R.

For those who don't live in the northwest, Folklife is a giant carnival-like weekend of folk music, dance, and arts and crafts. It takes over the entire Seattle Center, and has like 20 different stages, so you could really wander around all day and enjoy Zimbabwean music next to Celtic music next to a band that mixes Zimbabwean and Celtic music. (I kid you not, there are some pretty eclectic performers out there!) The music is all excellent; the crowds perhaps not so much. Particularly with the Seattle Center's layout and the food stalls all being stacked up on top of each other, it gets pretty claustrophobic in a hurry. The stroller acts somewhat like a cattle catcher as far as carving a path through the crowds, but it still gets pretty uncomfortable, and Zachary got unhappy when the stroller couldn't make quick enough progress, so I was eventually holding him while pushing the stroller.

Meh's group had a fabulous show, and many friends were there to cheer them on, which was wonderful. Zachary was happy through most of the show, and again, really got a giant smile on his face and laughed every time people applaued between pieces. Oh, and during pieces he kept finding women around us to smile at and make happy sounds towards - he's such a little flirt! If you'd like to hear the concert, check out the recording I made here. Interestingly, when we listened to it on the drive home, Zachary didn't have any reaction to the applause - maybe he really does need to see people clap their hands for him to be happy and to know it?

Rollover Plan

The Selfon brothers both reached milestones in the last twenty four hours -- one auspicious, the other perhaps a bit less so.

First, the big news -- Zachary has officially rolled from his front to his back! Meh got him to accomplish this feat last night (day 138) by waving a colorful remote control in front of him, then gradually moving it over his head. As he followed it with his eyes and head, he eventually tilted and then tipped over onto his back. She called me inside (from another fruitless round of leaf raking and bagging) and Zachary was able to reproduce the flip for me. Then we attempted to make a video recording, and the results were, er, a little less definitive. But honest, it did happen - twice!

Zachary's grasping is also getting more sophisticated; today while mommy was reading to him, he started grabbing board book pages. With some encouragement, he even starting flipping them. Granted, he was flipping them backwards (and with the left hand no less), but it's a start. We'll have to work on reading more of the Hebrew board books while he's on this right-to-left kick.

Meanwhile, Korby has apparently reached the ultimate expression of his one great skill: Houdini-ing himself out of our yard. I've continually patched a variety of sections of our gradually failing encircling fence, but today he found yet another mysterious hidden portal to the outer world. Usually, this portal has just led to the neighbor's fully fenced yard, so he's still contained, and within a few feet of us and our porous border. But a few times in the last month, he's somehow found an exit from that fenced yard. (Incidentally, I've walked the full perimeters of both fences at this point and can't figure out where he's getting through.) With the tremendous help of fellow dog owners in the area, I've usually found him soon afterwards -- his favorite haunts are the junior high school track and the spacious park down the road from us.

But this morning, at 8:30 am, he was gone once more - and multiple circlings by car and foot of our neighborhood, the park, the junior high, and surrounding area were unsuccessful. 90 minutes of ever-widening searches later (again, featuring some very helpful fellow dog owners), we thankfully received a phone call that someone had retrieved him and was holding him. Korby had travelled more than two miles as the crow flies -- which likely means five or more miles as the Korby roams. Thankfully, he hadn't crossed any major streets, but still, we think it's likely time to just give up and invest in a tree-wrapped leash for him.

Watch out, they spit

We've already discussed Zachary's raspberrying, which is incidentally now back in vogue after a few days absence. He's also starting to mimic/respond to our own pfft'ing, which is definitely an exciting development - our first 'conversations'. Why do I fear our conversations may eventually degrade back down to this stage in the teenage years? :)

A quick funny story - he and I went to see our favorite Microsoft a cappella group (yes, there actually is more than one) perform last night (at a local library nonetheless, after visiting mommy at her library earlier in the day - Zachary was inadvertently taking a tour of the county's regional libraries!). He was absolutely great, really happy and kicking, and totally quiet and open-mouthed the whole time. Except right after the group announced they were going to be singing their last piece, when he made a loud raspberry that had a few folks around us chuckling.

But no, today, I am going to focus on the other kind of spitting -- spitting up. No matter the time of day, whether he's just eaten five minutes ago or several hours before, we are not safe from spit up. It's ended up in some obvious and less likely places: himself, his clothes, our clothes (his skill at targetting mommy while he himself remains spotless is impressive), the couch, the floor, the changing table, his play mat, the wall, and most recently my hair. You see, I was trying out the whole Zachary-sitting-on-my-shoulders thing, and we were having a great time, and then I saw in the mirror that he had a large smile on his face. Uh-oh. The big smile often means he's feeling great because he's just spit up. I felt my head, and sure enough, I was toweling the stuff out of my hair for seemingly the next few hours. Other parents clearly have experience here; when I asked for advice from a friend in preparing for my first full day alone with Zachary, the friend replied to 'get a towel ready'. I got his e-mail message right after Zachary spit up on my shirt and pants.

Naked Baffy Time!

Bath time is arguably Zachary's happiest time of day (if you don't count dancing time, bouncing time, flying time, or "pffft" time). We tried to capture some of the joy on film. Here's take 1:



And here's take 2:



As we have seen before, Scoot has a thing about taking pictures of our baby naked. I was chastised for taking nude photos of Zachary that showed glimpses of his goods, when really I was just trying to capture his delectable tushy for posterity (no pun intended!). That is why Take 2 includes the crude loincloth. But I believe that it is customary to have naked baby material socked away in order to gently encourage your teen to obey his curfew ("I think this photo will be perfect for the graduation announcements!"), do his homework, eat his green vegetables, etc.

Shave and a haircut

(Makes you appreciate just how good of a deal two bits would be; my haircut was free today, and it still cost quite a bit more than 25 cents just for the tip!)

At long last, about two months since my last haircut and more than a month since shaving, the hair came off today, at the barber in the morning and with the electric shaver in the evening. (Note to self: as with paint and cleaning products, best to try the shaver in an inconspicuous area first to see how it goes. My poor 10+ year-old electric had never seen such a workout, struggled throughout the process, and I think it was near meltdown by the end.)


We'll have to see if Zachary recognizes his daddy come morning...

Zachary's latest vocal exercise involves what Meh calls gargling, but what I think sounds cooler when termed alveolar trilling. Take a listen to him here.

I read through a fascinating book several months before Zachary about how all babies effectively learn (and then unlearn) all of the possible sounds of human language before honing in on their own. I know it's silly, but to try to encourage him to keep his options open (rather than struggling with things like daddy's issues with the trilled 'erre' sound in Spanish), I've been saying words to him with more exotic non-English sounds like 'perro' and 'Xhosa' (which starts with a clicking sound). He really loves the clicking sound for some reason, and it generally results in big open-mouthed smiles. I think he has also started clicking, though not predictably yet. We also of course listen to his world music CD, though those songs tend to consist of primarily English or Romance language lyrics.

Let it snow...

Very quickly after discovering razzing, Zachary has advanced to more complex tones with these cute high-pitched squeals. I think the top of his singing range may be higher than Meh's. Listen to his first aria here.

Snowfall in Seattle is relatively rare (usually 2-3 times per season, and it doesn't stick), but this afternoon we started seeing the white stuff, and it's been getting heavier as the day has progressed. Korby of course treats snow as just another kind of food, so he goes outside, licks every possible surface, gets the doggie equivalent of brain freeze, and comes inside shivering for a bit until we can warm him back up. Silly dog.

Zachary has been enjoying the snowfall as well; he's been laughing, squeaking, and razzing all afternoon long. We took a few short videos with our camera; I'll try posting a few here, though we may move them to a more video-centric site at some point. (Any suggestions or recommendations?)

Say it, don't spray it

In the case of verbal development, apparently the "spray" part comes first. On Tuesday, Zachary figured out how to make raspberries, and he often loves doing nothing better now -- even sometimes at 4 or 5 in the morning. It's super cute though; doesn't matter of you're 3 months or 31 years old, farting noises are always fun. Of course this does mean that everything gets slimed, so thank goodness for heavy-duty bibs.

He still doesn't appear to make any direct connection to us doing it yet; no imitation or anything, though he does smile when he hears/sees us razzing, but here he is, in all of his spraying glory.

The beard has been garnering some serious discussion among friends and coworkers. Actually, I feel a bit bad, since some folks jokingly ask about it (one coworker asked if I was going for the Ewok look - should I be offended? :) and then I've got to tell them about the tradition behind the beard and wild hair during shloshim. But anyway, I've found it interesting that those who have facial hair (or have had it in the past) have been actively lobbying me to keep it. I'm not a big fan, but seeing as I missed the elections in early November, I figured I'd put it up for a vote -- look for your options to the right. Not that I'll necessarily abide by the results, but hey, considering it may be the last time my hair and beard get this long, might as well see what the consensus is.

Only 7 shopping days left...

(Granted, there are technically 15 until Chanukah ends.)

Now I know that everyone loves to listen to holiday music starting right after Thanksgiving (if not before), and particularly orchestral pieces, and more specifically all-new compositions that you can't even really sing along to. But what you were all really hoping for was a recording of the Prague Radio Symphony performing such Christmas music, preferably with a single Chanukah piece thrown in for variety. Well then, have I got the album for you – even better, it’s a double CD! Yes, 21 tracks of tastiness. And one of them (the strategically placed disc 1, track 4, Chanukah Glow) was composed by me.

Several years ago, I got somewhat annoyed with my community orchestra's sparse options for Chanukah music at their annual December "Holiday" (read: Christmas plus token Chanukah piece) Concert - they annually cycled between the same two or three pieces. The pieces themselves were okay (well, except for one in particular that kind of offended Meh, titled something like "Christmas Time Around the World", which was a medley of world Christmas music, and included a Chanukah song representing 'Israel'), but they were always pretty standard medley mashups of the same old tunes.

So I figured what the heck, did a bit of research, found some fascinating and less-known Chanukah folk songs and contemporary pieces, and put them together into a new piece I titled Chanukah Glow, which my orchestra graciously tried out and performed for it's 2005 Chris-, er, Holiday, concert. It was well received by the players and the 50-100 people that attend the community orchestra's concerts, but that was about it. Couldn't figure out how to get it published, or promoted to professional orchestras (who don't seem to generally play token Chanukah pieces at all!), or even professionally recorded. I figured that was the end of things.

Then earlier this year, I heard about an upcoming CD of new holiday music that had an open call for submissions. I put the score in the mail, and several weeks later heard that my piece had been accepted! The conductor was very friendly (and excited to be recording a Chanukah piece; the label's first holiday album was all Xmas), the piece was recorded by the Prague Radio Symphony Orchestra (SOČR) in the Czech Republic in May, and I got an e-mail today that it's now out and available! Look for "Holidays of the New Era: Volume 2" in stores or online venues near you.

• On Amazon here. (Where it's impressively ranked as a 164,000th-best-seller. The number actually keeps getting bigger as I write this blog entry. Should they even bother showing a ranking after, say, a few thousand?)
• On NuMusic (the publisher's website) here.
• Also available on Rhapsody, Napster, iTunes, and other online stores if you don't want to trudge through 2 CDs and 21 tracks just for my one little piece (though I'm sure based on what I've seen from this label in the past that the other pieces are excellent in their own rights). I won't be insulted if you bypass the stellar program notes and such. (Or you can even view them, as well as hearing the original community orchestra's recording on my website.)

And this concludes today's paid advertisement. Tomorrow: back to the cuteness of Zachary.

The First 100 Days

The shiva period for my dad concluded this morning according to our rabbi; as my family debated earlier in the week, the math was actually a bit fuzzy here, though I think I now sort of understand how 7 days of shiva translated into Sunday through Friday morning: the day of the funeral is the first day, that same evening begins the second day (the Jewish days begin at sunset), so Thursday night began the 6th 'day', and shiva isn't observed on Shabbat, so that ends shiva on Friday morning. Regardless, as I've said before, it was very comforting to have friends and family come together throughout the days, for evening services, and to share stories both new and old about my dad.

With United being totally inflexible about flight availability, I headed back to Seattle on a 6:50 am flight. The connection was through Chicago, where I walked past a funny new ad for Sony's digital book reader that talks about the devices being "sexier than a librarian". I personally beg to differ of course. But never fear, some librarians are already taking offense, leading to this response from Sony. I think they've already adjusted the campaign; I'm pretty sure the ad I saw had something like "comparison may vary with your librarian." *chuckle* The second leg was oddly on one of the giant 777's - weird to be on one for a domestic US flight, though I won't complain about the extra space and like twenty audio channels and such.

Today Zachary is 100 days old! He's noticeably more active than when I left two weeks ago (though I, and the rest of our family, gladly got to see some of his increasing cuteness when he came to Michigan), and is very responsive to our faces. He and I had some nice play time on tummy, back, and sitting up today. We've noticed he's now often happy and vocal for extensive periods; Meh made this recording while I was gone. Zachary is even (sometimes) starting to master the art of laughing without degenerating into hiccups, though not in this particular recording.

There is a season

As some of you know, I have been away from Meh and Zachary since late Thursday night, flying to Michigan to be with family as my dad's condition degrades. It has been impossibly difficult in so many ways -- seeing and being with my dad in this clearly terminal state, my brother and I trying to help my mom make final arrangements, and being away from my wife and son for an extended period.

We've watched with happiness and joy as Zachary continues to grow and develop, gaining new skills and understanding, reaching new milestones, and looking at the world with increasing wonder. Unfortunately, as a harsh and cruel antithesis, I've also watched my father's -- Zachary's grandfather's -- continuing deterioration, with increasing debilities and skill restrictions. These next few blog entries will by no means be intended as precursors to a eulogy or anything like that; the disease that is claiming my father does not and should not define who he was in life.

It seems an incredibly long time ago (and yet in some ways, like it was yesterday) that my mom noticed subtle and then significant behavioral changes, and that my dad was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease -- nearly ten years ago, at the impossibly and infuriatingly early age of 48. Even now, he remains the youngest resident at his care facility (and doubly depressingly, many of the elder residents were more lucid than him, even when he was first admitted). My mom had cared untiringly and amazingly for him at home for an extended period as his facilities gradually faded, but he eventually required more professional care in a facility that has featured incredibly kind, caring, and respectful staff. I continued to visit when I could, though I feel not nearly frequently enough; on each visit, something more had been taken away -- recognition, motor skills, speech, walking. My mom's strength at dealing with the insufferable situation continued to amaze me.

One bright light as the disease has progressed is our family's friends, who have all been incredibly supportive, kind, generous, and have themselves shared in the grief of slowly losing my dad. My parents' neighbors have done everything from household chores, home improvements, and errands, to watching and caring for Gus. Our family friends actively include my mom in their activities, visit and interact with my dad, and have done everything in their power to continue to buoy up my mom, brother, and myself. And my brother, my dad's sister, and my bubbie have come to visit my mom and dad on multiple occasions as well. There have also been various attempts to put our feelings to paper; my brother wrote an incredible essay (that unfortunately has not yet been published), and I wrote my musical composition. And perhaps most significantly, Zachary got to meet his grandfather when we came to town for his pidyon ha-ben, even if neither of them may have had much understanding or perception of the event.

A little over a month ago, the disease's latest turn left him mostly immobile and first wheelchair-bound, then bed-ridden. This past week, his ability to consistently swallow disappeared. At least he does seem to be at peace, and he is surrounded by those who love and care for him (both family and many friends have visited as well).

Which brings us to the simply surreal logistics of planning for what comes next -- discussions with cemeteries, funeral homes, etc. I still need to process these a bit, but I can at least report that so much of the "built-in" process for Jewish end of life traditions is focused on caring for the living, the family left behind. Even with the incredible support structure we have both here and in the cities where our family extends to, it's comforting to know that there's an extended procured period for processing and coming to grips with the reality of a relative's passing.

Sorry to write such a downer blog entry, but many friends had been asking and wanting to know what was happening. If you feel a need to take some kind of action immediately, there's no more appropriate time; it's curently Alzheimer's Awareness Month, and you can donate on the Alzheimer's Association website. Beyond that, thank you so much to all of our friends for looking in on Meh and Zachary, and for your thoughts and well wishes at this difficult time.

Mini Microsoft

(For those not familiar, the actual Mini Microsoft [hosted right here on BlogSpot] is a blog by a 'secret' MS employee that cuts through the business-speak and presents an employee's comments on internal/external perspectives of our company. Granted, my attempts at humor in entry titles is pretty much dead on arrival when it's a pun that I have to explain. Ah well.)

Zachary received a colorful surprise package in the mail late last week (though strangely, the accompanying note was actually post-dated for today?). We opened it up to discover a wealth of small gifts welcoming him to "Microsoft's growing family" -- a Dr. Seuss "red fish, blue fish" bib (with the Microsoft logo at the bottom), a solid white onesie (with the Microsoft logo at the top), and a host of branding-free objects as well: a nice brushed metal picture frame that we can engrave his birthday information on, a Taggies rattle (with lots of tags on the sides and a reflective front that makes even funhouse mirrors look tame), a small rubber ducky from Microsoft's credit union, and even a super-cozy Nanny and Webster blanket (branding free, and all proceeds go to support children's charities).

It's really nice that my company's benefits department puts together this little care package on top of all of the other family assistance they provide. The rattle is already getting some good use - Zachary occasionally grasps it, and today Meh was tickling his face with the tags, generating a great series of laughs and giggles that I got to share on the phone. He's got the best laugh! Here's a new recording from the weekend, where he really thought what I was saying (or my expression? or perhaps just my face?) was the funniest thing in the world.

You and me and the bottle makes three tonight

Last night, in honor of Zachary's 6-week (and Meh's 6-week-since-any-continuous-sleep) anniversary, we made our first attempt at a late-night bottle feeding. At around 4 in the morning, Zachary was squirming for food, so he and I headed downstairs, where I gave him a tasty bottle. He loved it! Didn't even need to do all of that craziness with warming it up or anything. On the plus side, it seemed to work quite well: no fussing, minimal extra air, quick to make some nice burps afterwards, and we could let mommy sleep. Well, for a good ten minutes at least; on the minus side, this kid has a serious appetite - he drained the bottle and still wanted more, so after a quick costume change (which made him even more vocal), back up to mommy we had to go. But as a proof of concept, the bottle worked out quite smoothly; we'll gradually start to expand this as we get closer to Meh heading back to work.

In the mornings, Zachary is sometimes fussy, but often quiet and alert. Well, alert at any rate; you can be the judge of how quiet he is from his newest audio recording (definitely a departure from his previous in-vitro record album, which was made in his amplified percussive electronica phase, when he was the artist known as "Ziggy"). This is him having 'tummy time' on his playmat, alternately looking at/calling to his favorite little stuffed lion and the cute little boy in the reflective mirror, all while trying to simultaneously crawl towards both objects at the same time (on opposite sides of him). While I don't think he'll have much success going in two directions at once, I suspect this kid is going to be mobile sooner rather than later.