At peace

The last few days have been extraordinarily difficult for our entire family (both those at home in Michigan and on the two coasts), filled with sadness, planning, and making some of the most difficult decisions our family has ever faced. We visited multiple cemeteries and funeral homes; spoke with counselors, nurses, social workers, rabbis, and chaplains; sat with Dad while we told stories, laughed, and cried, both together and individually. Most of the initial preparations were finally completed by yesterday evening, and we all wished Dad good night, perhaps for the last time, before heading home.

Early this morning, we received the phone call that my father had passed away during the night. The three of us sat around the dining room table at 3 in the morning and told more stories about Dad, and how we knew his long and difficult journey was now over, and how he was now at peace.

Again, thank you so much to all of our friends, who have continued to support and console us in our grief. Here's the information we saw printed out just a few hours ago, displayed so officially for newspaper obituary submission:

• The funeral service for Stephen S. Selfon, DVM, will be held on Sunday, November 11, at 2 pm, at The Dorfman Chapel in Farmington Hills, Michigan.
  
• Following the burial, we will be sitting shiva (the traditional 7-day Jewish mourning period, where the family remains in the home, and friends of my dad can come and be with us) beginning immediately afterwards at our home, and continuing for the rest of the week (ending on Friday morning; the observation of Shabbat preempts shiva, and that would be the seventh day, reckoning by the Jewish calendar). Evening services will be at around 7 pm, or people can visit any time before that. [Directions and construction notes at the bottom of this post.]
  
• For those who would like to send messages to my mom and the rest of our family, you can of course post on this blog, on the chapel's website, or more formally send notes to our home:
  
  
  
  
• If anyone would like to make a donation in my father's memory, the suggested options are the Alzheimer's Association (our family's local chapter is the Metro Detroit one); the Michigan State College of Veterinary Medicine; or the charity of your choice.

Once again, thanks to all of our friends for their continuing support and love at this exceptionally sad and difficult time.

To Our House:
As I learned when my parents first moved to White Lake, street grids unfortunately don't work very well when there are ridiculous numbers of randomly placed lakes. Now throw in an illogical insistence on naming every street (even those perpendicular to each other) "Commerce," and a few giant construction projects blocking off roads around our house, and we've got a recipe for good times.